Intrigued by all the posturing and promising currently abound in Westminster and the increasing possibility of another General Election, I was inspired to take a break from writing Poems for the People in order to write one for the politicians.
I’m watching you
An announced candidacy and a strong confident wave
I’ve seen this show before
A handshake with past party leaders and a practised smile as the camera pops
I know exactly what you’re going to do
A suitably-proud spouse and well-groomed kids carefully placed to strike a pose
Assemble the pawns and arrange the pieces
First a cheery greeting from the polished door of a garish bus with a brazen slogan
Here we go
Now surround yourself with placards and a well-drilled army of on-cue applauders
I feel familiar angst return
Then spout repeated practised soundbites and shamelessly flip every unwelcome question
The jagged bile is rising
Promptly proceed to pub to pull the pint then bend and kiss the bemused and innocent baby
Savage inner torment
Next dash to a party-amenable school where infants can be visited and read a familiar story
Intense cranial pounding
Fast forward to the factory floor to pour praise upon strictly-corralled blue-collared workers
Twisting claw behind my eyeball
Proceed to pop to a friendly cafe and launch a boisterous attempt on the totemic bacon sarnie
Acute watery diarrhoea
All the while remembering to repeat the oh-so-important all-encompassing promise of change
Dire fear of bladder prolapse
Stay focused. Maintain message. Cower behind the comfort of clichés.
Don’t do any of it.
None of it.
Click the link here for a sample from the Poems for the People collection.